The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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