So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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