How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
