you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
