cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
