Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
