the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
