No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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