why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
