She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
