dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
