I'm laying in your front yard are you home
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I just want nice things and good sex
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize