we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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