she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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