I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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