He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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