is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
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