new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
