At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
being pregnant is like rehab
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
God, I missed his penis.
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