Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize