I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
