i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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