WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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