We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
