It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
