His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
