just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
smell my finger.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
