Got a toothbrush?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
