You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
