Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
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