Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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