So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
