Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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