maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
