elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
She bit a glass in half.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
