i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
