Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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