Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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