If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
