exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize