I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
My feet surprised me
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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