check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
