I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
