I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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