I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
