no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
