I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
