No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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