ya dads aren't the best wingmen
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
