it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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