Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
