I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
