dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
